Legends in the making

Calamity Jane. The history around this woman is not clear at all and, upon my bit of research, appears that she wrote most of it up herself. But…isn’t that great?! We are talking 1800’s. A long darn time ago. Way before women’s rights. Way before women had voices. So how did her voice sustain centuries to be heard even today? Many say that she “exaggerated” or “completely fabricated” stories about herself. Yet, she has become legendary as ‘Calamity Jane’. She hangs (see above) on my daughter’s wall as a legend, a hero. However, I have only recently really looked into her actual history. A bit sordid perhaps. Hum, but really who knows? If what the researchers say, she wrote up most of it herself. What we do know is that she was a woman who perserved in her time to become a legend. Even if she exaggerated her own stories, well-again- isn’t that great? Back then, a lady probably needed to! From what I can gather of the “truth” is that she did become a storyteller in Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show”. She, then, in her later years, used her minimal fame and fortune to start her own Ranch and Inn. Go girl! Some say she was a “shady lady” and that was how she earned her fame. I had never heard that one in the story of her legend. Others say she was a generous kind woman who reached out to help others. She was “known for her helpfulness, generosity and willingness to undertake demanding and even dangerous tasks to help others”. Well, I contemplate this hanging in my daughter’s room that I had thought so innocent. Perhaps, not? This woman’s history is ….shady-ish. It is okay I decide. Because I see a young woman who sustained in a time when “ladies” simply did not. A time when, ladies tended the homefires, the young, and the… dinner. A time when, often, the women did not go out and become LEGENDARY. Calamity Jane. We all know the name. For heaven’s sake, she was for sale in a chain store when I purchased the poster that I ripped and framed for my little girl. For heaven’s sake, we all “know” Calamity Jane. For better or for worse. But we all know her. And she was a brave one for her time. That’s a cowgirl if ever I knew one.

Locker

“I figure if a girl wants to be a legend, she should go ahead and be one”

   -Calamity Jane. I agree!

Friday’s moment

Joining Soulemama.com in the tradition of “this moment”:

{this moment} ~ A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. If you’re inspired to do the same, leave a link to your ‘moment’ in the comments for all to find and see.

 

Exhaustion

Living at the stables

Have I mentioned what hard work this can be here? Exhaustion. Absolute and complete exhaustion. I have never known this kind of tired before. I feel it in my bones, my muscles, my mind and my emotional tolerance threshold. I have certainly worked hard before in my life and have always been a very busy type of personality. However, now that I live in this stable of 50 plus horses as well as homeschool my daughter, this level of busy has upped it’s ante on me. I thought I had slowed down my lifestyle to come here and live in this environment. I left the world of chaos, materialism and superficiality behind to leave the city life and live here experiencing this “slower paced” way of life. I wanted myself and my family to know and live differently. In some ways, yes, life has slowed down. Slowed to remember what’s really important. Slowed to show me a brilliant neon pink sunrise while the crisp early fall air hits my face. Slowed to watch birds nest and peek back into those nests each day to see when the eggs hatch and admire the tiny baby birds. Slowed to the satisfying feeling of dirt on your face, hay in your hair and real sweat on your forehead. Slowed to the basics of life and nature. Horses show you how to slow down. Food, water, shelter. Then it’s all okay. And, when you are stressed out or hurried, they will definetly let you know and ask you to look inside yourself by acting up. The horses are constant reminders to slow down. But what full days we have here! Sunrise to sundown, and then more. I am finding it hard to keep up on the little things. Any suggestions for time management? We rise with the sun to feed, check waters, clean stalls, ride and exercise the ones that we are responsible for, homeschool somewhere in and out of there (math, reading, art…), teach a couple of riding lessons, run my daughter to her handwork (knitting) class, stop at the post office, back home, answer questions for people stopping by asking about trail rides, help a boarder fit their new saddle, casual boarder conversation about the weather, sell a few bales of alfalfa (got to run around to find change!) dinner, showers, read to my little girl, tuck her into bed, sweep out the barn, check on the horses, dump the trash, check the calendar for tomorrow. Then I find it’s 10:00 at night and I haven’t yet done the dishes, picked up the house, finished the load of laundry that sat in the washer all day and now smells too mildewy to put in the dryer and fold. Also, I do enjoy the time for myself to post a tidbit or two here on this blog. Oh, and prepare our schooling lesson for tomorrow. Off to bed about midnight. Read some, fall asleep and up again at sunrise to feed. It is an exhausting and very full life here. We are just still trying to find our rhythm. It is a satisfying exhaustion at the end of the day though and I know we will figure it all out eventually.

Cowgirls

Blog 15
Cowgirls. We are not always who you think we should be. And we are always who we are. Take it or leave it. We are not the average girls and we’re not saying we are anything extra special either. We are amazing everyday in the quiet brimming under the excitement. Here’s to my little girl, Sahalie. For all of who she is. I am so thankful for her and the ways she reminds me that everything is okay. She reminds me to stop worrying. She reminds me to look up at the beautiful sunrise. She reminds me to not get stuck in the details. “Don’t let the details ruin the whole big fun”….That is her favorite saying. Did I mention she is only seven years old? Seven years on this Earth, but so much older and so much wiser than I know. In many ways, I am here having this adventure for her. When it feels like really hard work and I desperately miss my privacy and old life I remind myself of what she gets to experience. What little girl’s dream wouldn’t involve living in a barn and running a stable? She loves these horses as much as I do, only she remembers to be grateful and excited for the experience and opportunity to love. Even though we homeschool and I am the “teacher”, it is she that teaches me every single day. Thank you, Sahalie.

Beauty


And, here it is. I have struggled with what my first post should be for far too long. I keep thinking it has to be perfection, beautiful, embodiment of this new wonderful life. Then as I was sorting through pictures, I saw this one I took one of my first days here. One thing I am learning in my few months here is to let go of high expectations, accept what is and that “what is” can be beautiful in it’s own way. And, here it is.